Where Did Jerma Say I Soiled My Baby Diaper
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles [Out of the Shadows]. It starts out like any other Basically, until the clone drones show up. At which point, it becomes nonsense., where STAR_ spends yet another slow day on Hightower to troll Snipers with the Equalizer taunt.- "I'm on a plank."
- After taking out a Demoman with a rocket jump+Equalizer.
- "Why you fight me?! I got DA KRITZ!!" (Caption: Kritz Status: Fully Charged)
- When two Snipers finds out he's there, one of whom tries to headshot the taunting STAR_ at point-blank range.
STAR_: What is this?! WHAT IS THIS?!? (STAR_'s taunt kills them both)
- STAR_ encounter an Heavy who is shooting at the sky for an unexplained reason. After running out of Minigun ammo, the Heavy can later be seen shooting at the sky with a shotgun instead.
- I TAUNT AFTER EVERY KILL
- One sniper complains: "omg star is big noob". Cut to STAR_ taunt kill-dominating him.
- "Mooooooaaaaaannnn..."
- "That... that demoman."
- "Is... this is a Spy. Hi Spy. I gonna kill you now."
, aka Jerma is Mad pt. 1.- All of Jerma's quotes while he's oblivious to the fact that STAR_ is in his games anonymously trolling him.
Jerma: (STAR_ as a Pyro keeps airblasting him away) You wanna play that game? Keep like, keep like knocking me around. (STAR_ instead whips out his shotgun and kills him.) You f***ing c**t...
Jerma: (As a Soldier) [I'm] gonna shit in everybody in this room's cereal (STAR_ reflects all his rockets, killing Jerma) ...and by that I mean miss every shot.
Jerma: (As a Huntsman Sniper) If I don't get three headshots in a row right now, I'm going to reach into the toilet and eat my own shit. (STAR_, as a Heavy, leaps up to absorb his arrow, Jerma immediately falls AFK) I'll be back, I gotta eat my own shit. ...I'm not gonna use that, you think I'm gonna use that? You crazy?
Jerma: (As a Demoknight) Damn sentry over there. There's a sentry up there too, isn't there- (Pyro!STAR_ starts airblasting him) Whoa, whoa, hey. What the fuck. (STAR_ airblasts him into the Sentry, killing Jerma) GET THE FU- (sighs) I seriously thought this was just you.
STAR_: What?
Jerma: There is a Pyro, just airblasting me in the air, over and over again. (STAR_ laughs) I, I really checked and thought, that's STAR_ and it's not you.
- The moment he realizes, just after STAR_ headshots him as a Sniper and taunts.
Jerma: This guy's name is U SUX!! Haha! Hahahaha! ...oh my god, that's you.
STAR_: (bursts out laughing) Oh and I got it on recording that you got upset about it.
Jerma: Oh - my - god... (laughing) you fucking dick...
STAR_: (headshots him again and taunts again) I came to ruin your gameplay.
- One of the names of STAR_'s teammates (during the airblast into Sentry clip) is "Awkward Gassy Burrito Night Sex".
- "You can't hold back when you got DA WHIP. Especially not on Pyro."
- STAR_ and Jerma enter Nucleus as BLU Huntsman snipers, only to get promptly mowed down by a hacking lightning-fast Heavy.
- The ending clip, where STAR_ and Jerma are at a pizza parlor and STAR_ zooms in on a smiling pizza that looks... baked.
: All of Jerma's hilariously terrible attempts to get revenge on STAR_.- "Y'know, dont... say... s-swears..." (barely 10 seconds later) "How the fuck did you do that?"
- After losing a Ham-Off, Jerma devolves into his usual high-humor frustration.
Jerma: (key smashing) I'm seriously gonna go sit down on the toilet and piss up into my face. (Cue STAR_'s laughter)
- Jerma delivers a Badass Boast during setup for a new match on Badwater.
Jerma: I'm going to try as hard as I- I'm going to be the sweatiest fucking try-hard in this server. I'm going to kill you. I'm going to be a silent but deadly smelly fart in your face. I hope you're ready. (Caption: Best Attempt In 5, 4, 3, 2, 1)
(Jerma rocket jumps out of the spawn, STAR_ shoots him out of midair, and Jerma dies due to fall damage. STAR_ gains another Domination on him.)
- When playing King of the Hill on Nucleus, STAR_'s team loses, becomes helpless, and Jerma's seemingly got a chance for revenge at last.
- After Jerma tries to kill him with the harmless Sticky Jumper.
STAR_: Have you ever played this game before? It's called TF2, it's free-to-play, um, people always make jokes about how there's hats in it, Gabe Newell, Half-Life 3 confirmed...
- There's also a Funny Background Event during the Sticky Jumper bit-RED team appears to have a large amount of spies.
.- The video opens with STAR_ and Jerma spectating on a Spy, who is clearly Too Dumb to Live.
STAR_: (narrating) Just find my way out there, get some backstabs, make some plays. (The Spy begins stabbing a pumpkin) Get the pumpkin, gonna get the pumpkin!
Jerma: Yeah, come on, that was dangerous! That was a (laughing) dangerous pumpkin!
STAR_: (narrating) Walk across the field into TWO PYROS!
STAR_: (laughs) Who IS this guy?
Jerma: I don't know, but he's a real team player!
- Jerma and STAR_ decide to hold a Sniper vs. Sniper match. It'd be a Sniper Duel for the ages... if it weren't the fact that STAR_ fudges the terms by shooting Jerma the second that he steps out of spawn. Jerma's reaction to that is golden.
- And of course Jerma's reaction to his own reaction:
- Halfway through Jerma, once again frustrated that STAR_ is dominating him, hatches a fiendish plot to get revenge on him: being a Cloak and Dagger Spy hiding outside of BLU Spawn. It backfires miserably.
Jerma: Who knows the truth... (STAR_'s caption: Let me find out...) Who really knows the truth of where he is and what he's doing... (STAR_ goes to spectate) Nobody knows. (Caption: I know.) The only person who knows the truth is me. And the truth shall set you free! (STAR_ rejoins the game) The truth shall set you— (STAR_ kills him, muffled sounds of Jerma beating his keyboard in anger)
STAR_: (laughs) Get! Decimated!
- A lucky word coincidence.
STAR_: (Watching an Engineer build a Sentry through deathcam) I wasn't sure if I was gonna make the video, but at this point I'm like: "You know what, how could I like just not use that clip?" (A Pumpkin Bomb spawns next to the Sentry, the Engineer accidentally whacks it and kills himself) Oh my fucking God! Engineer! How could I not use that clip?!
- It gets to the point where STAR_ doesn't even have to try to kill him; killing Jerma will just come casually.
Jerma: (once again Cloak and Dagger invisible) I am in a secret special spot, that you'll never- (STAR_ rocket jumps, inadvertently killing the invisible Jerma)
- How Jerma finally outwits him: Being a Brass Beast Heavy slowly revving across a bridge. STAR_ thus underestimates him.
Jerma: (after killing STAR_) Get fucked. Get fucked. Get outta town!
STAR_: That's you?! That's seriously you?! I wasn't- Oh, that's how you kill me? The only reason I wasn't, like, fighting you was because I was like "there is no way he's like this stupid Brass Beast Heavy who's just mindlessly revved up." Like you suddenly become sentient when I get near you. [...] Dude, you were- nobody does that with the Brass Beast unless you've played this game for like 20 minutes. With the Gibus on. Okay, you figured out a way to get me.
Jerma: (laughs) With the Gibus on... I won! I did it!
aka Jerma is Mad Part 4. By now, you know the drill: STAR_ drives Jerma into the ground by killing him multiple times, with Jerma getting one or two kills over STAR_. This time, however, STAR_'s girlfriend, Ashlelang, is in the call.- The special intro this time is the Angry German Kid. As if we need to know even more what this video will entail.
- Jerma getting upset over STAR_ getting pocketed by his girlfriend, a Medic with the Kritzkrieg. It's like a spoiled child getting upset over not getting a toy.
- More precisely, he's upset about not getting overheal as a RED Soldier.
Jerma: If I don't get an over heal right now, I'm going to cause a lot of problems for you two.
Ashlelang: Oh?
Jerma: *mockingly* Oh, I'm STAR_, I have a pocket medic, that's how I got 17 kills in a row!
- In the next clip Jerma grabs a Small Med Pack...
right in STAR_'s line of sights. Needless to say he goes flying via getting killed by rocket.
Jerma: Fucking dammit, I knew you were around the goddamn corner; I still... (*sighs wearily*) I am going to fucking kill both of you motherfuckers!
STAR_: *chuckling* Wow, tone it back!
- The random cut to Storage Wars, where Barry gets reminded to watch the profanity, only with Jerma's face imposed over Barry's head.
- Jerma trying to get revenge as a Huntsman Sniper.
- At one point STAR_ dares his girlfriend to switch to Jerma's team and pocket Jerma. STAR_ (as Scout) effortlessly slaughters Jerma (as Heavy) and girlfriend in a matter of seconds.
- When Jerma finally manages to backstab STAR_ in The Stinger.
Jerma: SSSHHH! BE QUIET. BE QUIET, MY SON.
STAR_: (nervously) Alright, man. Okay.
, where STAR_'s friend, who is a Spy disguised as an Engineer, tries to make it look like he's whacking the sentry with his wrench... by looking up and down. Instead it looks like he's whacking it with his face.: (Everything Works!). Highlights include;- The ending line.
Auzzie: WORST DAY EVER!
- This exchange;
Star_: See, it's okay for trucks to go through [this arch]. The sign says "truck", so it's okay.
TrukTruk: *chuckling* That's good.
": All of Jerma's pranks to aggravate STAR_, such as using his ubercharge while still in setup time and forcing STAR_ to say "supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" in full if he wants to be Kritzkrieged. He did on the first try and instantly gets killed by a huntsman sniper.STAR_: "What are they all doing over there?! Who goes out of spawn that way?!"
- And then later...
Jerma: "Supercalifragalic- I don't even remember it, but you have to say it!
Jerma: "There it is." [pops uber]
": STAR_ basically goes mad with power and becomes a W+M1 Engineer. All while making crazy sounds.STAR_: (while zapping an enemy) Bllllllllllllrrrrrrrrrrrr!
", where Robin Walker cheats and gives his team infinite ubercharge and Valve Rocket Launchers. Just to even things out. - Also the first round, where STAR_, as a Kritzkrieged Demoman, begins defeating half of BLU Team... then gets hit by a train.
]": At 8 minutes in; not only does STAR_ spend half a minute with low health while a Medic's only a few feet away, he gets killed by a Spy... who was being healed by that Medic.- Every single time he's pointing out the Engineers that built on the last point, who are doing absolutely nothing to help their team advance. Worse, when their time comes and the enemy team comes to attack the last point, the Engineers and their Sentries are gone. Judging by the lack of debris, it seems they got bored and disconnected.
- At the end of the video he ends up going insane thanks to his teammates. Especially towards the Medic healing a spy while ignoring him
", Jerma accidentally joined the wrong team. Thinking they were all still enemies, he promptly slaughtered all of his teammates in spawn. A few seconds later, a vote was passed to kick him from the server.", where STAR_, as a Beggar's Bazooka Soldier, purposefully overfills his rocket launcher, blasts all over the place before falling to his death, and then his dead body speaks in Demoman's voice note This is actually a common MVM glitch. Look closely at the mercs' faces when someone presses F4 to say their Ready-Up line, and you'll notice that all of them mouth the words, even though only one guy should be saying it. ". STAR_ spends most of the video trolling his teammates by deploying his teleporter right underneath them while their back is turned so that they'll instantly teleport to spawn or a deathtrap.- The running gag of "like a diaper."
Sezco: Watch out, he's gonna put it under you... like a diaper.
Tagg: Where did he put it?
STAR_: It'll come when you least expect it... like a diaper.
Tagg: (laughing) Diapers are unexpected... in society...
Tagg: This tank has, like, lived past its expiration date.
Sezco: Like a diaper.
- When Jerma first gets teleported. Everyone else but him knows the truth.
Jerma: What? What?! STAR_, did you just put the teleporter underneath me? Your teleporter, I just went back to spawn... what the hell, did I just step on it or something?
Phrakture: It's been up at the staircase the entire time.
Jerma: Well, I walked into it and I teleported back to the exit where the-
Tagg: There's a "teleport back to spawn" canteen, you know. Did you hit that on accident?
Jerma: No. I don't have any canteens.
Phrakture: Did you walk all the way back to spawn and then forget that you walked there?
Jerma: (laughs) No, I was shooting the, uh, big Scout on the-
Tagg: Do you think he ever left spawn?
- The second time it happens, Jerma falls down the pit.
Jerma: Oh my fucking god... Fell down the hole too.
Tagg: 'Cause you're the only one that falls for it.
- It isn't just teleporters STAR_ trolls with. He also kills Jerma by luring a Sentry Buster over while hauling his sentry, causing Jerma to get caught in the blast.
Jerma: Whatizat- you dick! You fucking asshole!
STAR_: Everyone knows that's why you don't use the Brass Beast.
Jerma: Oh, so like your friend can't get a Sentry Buster to kill you?! Yeah. It's ain't gonna happen again! (Right after this, Jerma gets teleported to the pit and falls in.
- While in Mannhattan, STAR_ puts his tele exit near the death pit so his teammates will accidentally walk into it. When they get wise to that, STAR_ learns a better trick: place the tele exit right over the banana peel, then destroy the exit just as they arrive, so they are forced to slip and fall into the pit anyway.
- At the end of the Mannhattan tour, the players receive their loot. After all his pranking and teammate abuse, STAR_ receives a rare Professional Killstreak Huntsman fabricator, with a Team Shine sheen. To say he wasn't punished would be an understatement.
STAR_: I deserve this. (his team groans and complains)
- The video starts with:
STAR_: *Heavily slurred* Hey everybody it's *gibberish*! Now, now go.
Ma3laa: And Boo is in the call!
- Then they spend a few minutes talking about random stuff.
- STAR_ thinking the powerup pumpkins are sacks, which leads to this.
STAR_: Are they color-coded now for their sack content? Is that what this is?
Ma3laa: I picked up the wrong sack! Apparently red sacks are bad for you. Who knew?
- And this:
STAR_: See, there's like hats flying everywhere, I can't tell if this is a sack or if it's just another guy's viking beard. What's the black sack?
Ma3laa: *Small wheeze* D-Do you want me to answer that?
- Which is then followed by this gem:
Ma3laa: Have you heard Gaben told me it's called the Loch N' Load because he'd probably use it?
STAR_: *Laughing* Alright, I'm doing it! Okay.
- The best part about the video has got to be this, though:
STAR_: *Laughing again* Why were you taking kids to the Bone Zone!?
Ma3laa: *Chuckling* 'Cause I had- It was a school project thing, okay?
STAR_: That's not a good reason!
- The story somewhat goes like this: The kids are playing under a rhino with a giant plastic dick, and then they started to throw dirt at eachother, smacking eachother in the face with a plastic shovel, punching eachother in the face, and then an old lady sprant over with her stroller that has a baby inside, starts yelling at Ma3laa to take control of his kids, even though they aren't his.
"You think it's all fun and games until a kid takes a purple plastic shovel to the throat"
, where he sings while unboxing two dozen strongbox crates. Halfway through, the video gets hijacked by Jerma, who performs a rapid-speed rap played over the video "Crazy Frog Brothers". - The best part is that on the background, there's another video playing. It's about burning money bills, which might be what he's doing on the video (Wasting money on Crates and Keys).
has several, as Ma3laa and STAR_ try out tinkering with the weapon settings through mods, resulting in:- Stickybomb blankets that can't be detonated, yet still scare everyone out of pretty much the entire ground floor.
- Flamethrowers with an airblast strong enough to rival any Megaton Punch, right at Upward's BLU spawn.
- Everyone in the server having a Valve Rocket Launcher, and later giving one whole team flamethrowers with the airblast buffed to the point the other team gets completely steamrolled.
- Giving everyone a rocket launcher that is essentially a gatling flare cannon, hurting the computers more than the actual players.
Ma3laa: Oh god, I have like 4 FPS
STAR_: My sound, my game sound, is just done
- Giving everyone Death of a Thousand Cuts in rocket launcher form with a similarly fast-firing rocket launcher that does about 5 damage with a direct strike.
STAR_: You know, actually, this rocket launcher is so bad, and does so little damage, that this guy is cheating and using a pistol, and it's better.
- Shotguns that fire literally hundreds of pellets per shot, and can easily blast people away at car-crash speeds. He later reduces their spread enough to make them kill at sniper ranges, with the added bonus of the actual tracer-pellet shots looking like ray gun blasts.
]: STAR_ is challenged by Jerma to do an entertaining commentary video on an anime game. It's clear to say he succeeded.- STAR_ names his character Barack Obama, then has Darth Vader being the captain of his plane to Japan, while the Rebel fleet leaps to hyperspace.
- STAR_ reads through all his in-game dialogue sarcastically, and gives the girls robot voices.
STAR_: Wowwww. My beloved Japan! (Caption: I've never been here!) [...] I'll be staying with two brothers I met in a chat room, Makoto and Akira, but they're actually both goils!! (Sudden Eyedscreen on both sisters.) Wwwhat?! I could'va sworn they were boys. ...wait a minute! What if you ARE both boys! (Dutch Angle zoom-in on Makoto while scary music plays)
Makoto: (robotic voice) Ex-cuse-me-sor-ry-to-bo-ther-you-but-are-you-Ba-rack-O-ba-ma?
(clip of Obama, captioned "SHE KNOWS")
- STAR_ freaks out at the toilet that sprays water into his butthole. "Make it stooooohhhhp!!"
- "OBAMA BRINGING THE HOUSE DOWN!"
- When the game has him comment about the Japanese waiters giving him water before the meal.
STAR_: I've never had water in America.
Akira: Yeah! Water, tea, and a hand wipe after the maid's are done with you are the basics of Japanese hospitality!
STAR_: Oh yeah, you know, I could see that, you know. Japan is really attentive to your needs. (Beat) What absolutely ridiculous Japanese propaganda game am I playing right now?! [...] Well you know what, screw you, at least America doesn't make propaganda games. Screw you, Obeezie out. (Cut to a clip of a commerical for America's Army)
- On the morning of Day 2, STAR_ goes to the bathroom to wash his face, and walks in on Makoto naked, but instead he pays more attention to the laundry machine in the bathroom and how good an idea that is.
- "Day 5! I'm gonna be honest, I just don't know what happened on Day 4." (Later, on a second Day 5) See, this is actually Day 5, I don't know what happened to Day 4.
- The game starts setting up another wacky-walk-in-on-them-naked scenario. STAR_ sees it coming from a mile away.
Makoto: My-hu-man-sis-ter-must-still-be-a-sleep-would-you-please-go-wake-her-up?
STAR_: I already see where this is going. How could this not be where this is going? I'm gonna entertain the idea and go wake her up, sure, but I gotta tell ya, I didn't come all the way from Sweden to, you know...
- Sure enough, he walks in on Akira in her underwear.
STAR_: I just wanted to learn about Japan! I'm gonna be real now right now, I'm getting the fuck out of here! I just wanted to learn about Japan! You guys are twisted! (teddy bear in the background gains flaming eyes and an evil voice) I don't know what to do, they just keep coming at me, I don't know what to do, they - just- keep... (sees screenshot of his in-game avatar, with Hidden Eyes) Wait, I have no eyes!!!
- While Makoto starts trying to confess her love for him, STAR overhears a mic and thinks Jerma has returned. Instead it turns out to be Ma3laa, who is very confused about what's going on.
- During the final day, when Makoto starts coming on to the player, STAR_ kills the mood entirely.
Makoto: I-love-you-I-am-in-love-with-you-pro-cess-ing-e-mo-tion.
STAR_: I thought you were a robot, for a little while to be honest, but I feel the same way. Mmm. Ahh. Mmm. (starts making duck noises) I'm so glad I came to Japan to see you. This has been amazing for me.
Makoto: Kiss-me-again. (puckers up, rips off half her face to reveal a robot one ) EXTERMINATE!!!
": STAR_'s Motor Mouth narration when assaulting Point C of Standin' as a Scout.STAR_: And this RED Team thinks they're gonna win. You know, they're over here on Control Point C, thinking they're going to capture the last point, oh no problem, let's just high-five each other on top of this point, nobody gonna run in here and just meatshot all of us, oh-this-guy's-down-medic-taking-you-down-too-not-missing-shots-anymore-OH-I-GOT-FOH-KIDS-OBAMA-DONE-THIS-OBAMA-DONE-THAT-HE-PROMISE-SO-MANY-THINGS-BUT-IT-DON'T-NO-MATTER-NO-MORE. So that's Control Point C stopped, with no help from the government. We're walking on out of here, 'cause I just wanna go kill people.
has this gem of a moment, right after STAR_ dies to his oft-encountered enemy:*keyboard mashing sounds, random window shows up on top of TF2*
...I would like to say, that Windows Help and Support came up in my screen right now, because of how hard I hit my keyboard.
- The very end where STAR_ is a BLU Soldier asking Jerma, a RED Soldier, to cover him while STAR_ grabs a health pack. A RED Demoknight then bursts in... and just runs past them. He then runs at STAR_ again, but doesn't attack, and STAR_ blasts him upward with a rocket so he and the Demo can be a human totem pole.
provides many such moments:- The menu. *KLING* *DZZZT* *KLANG* every time a button is moused over. STAR_ can hear it all the way from Jerma's mic.
STAR_: ...you hover over things, and it just, like, cuts your ear open? *DZZZT*
- BE A PART OF SOIL!!!
- One moment that also qualifies as Awesome, he sees one player about to teleport onto him, and starts getting a backswing ready. And as soon as the teleport happens, the player in question finds himself with a BFS stuck in his gut.
- The usual STAR_ and Jerma shenanigans, culminating in a 10 minute duel. While on the same team.
- STAR_ trying to get elsewhere by jumping on a rock. Which turns out to not actually exist, sending him tumbling to his death.
. STAR_ and Tagg manage to throw the entire enemy team into disarray by themselves, tying up about half the enemy manpower into chasing them around their own spawn point. Even funnier, they actually are dangerous enough to warrant such a panic; anyone who ignores them quickly finds themselves with two .50 caliber bullets where their head used to be.:- Jerma's conditions: the loser has to donate $100 bucks to the charity, the winner... has to donate $100 bucks to the charity. STAR_ convinces him to raise the loser donation to $101 bucks.
- STAR_'s disbelief that Jerma is using BONK! Atomic Punch for their duel, in order to escape and attempt point-blank meatshots. At one point he manages to drink it just before STAR_ shoots him dead.
Jerma: Yes, yess, YES. (STAR_ whacks Jerma futilely with the Ham Shank) I AM the winner of this battle... (STAR_ pushes Jerma off the balcony. Jerma's invincibility wears off and STAR_ whacks him dead.)
- The server's poor connection means the two are often invisible, with only their hats and scatterguns floating around in the air where they should be.
- Later on the charity receives a $10 donation with the included message: "Please never have STAR_ and Jerma MGE ever again."
. video, STAR_ and his team are fighting on Badlands, having captured the first 4 points and about to assault the final one. STAR_ is a Loose Cannon Demoman being healed by a Kritzkrieg Medic.Medic: You have like the perfect loudout for crits.
STAR_: I am ready. (They enter BLU base) Just, just do it.
(The Kritzkrieg activates but STAR_ gets headshot just as he rounds the corner, his entire team bursts out laughing)
Sweet Genius. The show being already pretty darn odd, STAR_'s commentary, along with the show itself, quickly takes a turn for the seriously weird. And utterly hilarious.- His description of the winning plate in particular is a must-hear.
- Chef Ron quickly escalates in terms of Alternate Character Interpretation from simply a crazy chef, to an utter psycho, to the Demonic lord of baking. As for the contestants, they range from a Terminator, a wannabe shampoo model, and a clone of Chef Ron himself.
- "DUCKNESS."
- The final round is heralded by a repeating clip of Shaq dancing.
- I can take you back to your childhood...
, Star and Jerma play Robocraft and create some of the most ridiculous vehicles.- The very first thing Star made is a stickman (which he calls "The Man") which he could barely drive.
- Jerma's reaction to "The Man" deserves mention
- At one pint, Star gets stuck on a mountain. Jerma (as a alligator based vehicle) tries to get him unstuck by ramming into him. It fails miserably
- One of Jerma's vehicles is just a white panel which a (crooked) smiley face on it. He couldn't even move.
- "GET INSIDE ME!"
- "We need a paramedic!" Cue a skeleton walking past STAR_.
- The Superman convention.
- Queen Elsa is everywhere.
- Mom keeps calling STAR_.
- "Thanks, Sonic! Gotta go fast!"
, Star encounters a bear which has somehow contrived to get up on the roof of a furniture store. Star laughs at it for a bit and assures a nearby player that it's stuck on the roof and can't get down. A short time later he's exploring an office when that same bear comes BEARrelling through the doorway to maul him while epic music plays in the background.- Jerma and Star running around, arms in the air, aggressively surrendering at people.
- Being prone turns you invisible. No, seriously.
Jerma: Bewwies, bewwies, bewwies, bewwies. Gotta get some bewwies, bewwies, bewwies, bewwies.
- Jerma and Star chase a player while singing the above together.
:- Rami requested that STAR_ play the game with screenshake turned up beyond the default maximum, to 200%. Eventually, STAR_ turned it up to 500%. The result is STAR_ causing an earthquake with each shot, and Rami laughing uncontrollably in the background.
STAR_: <in the middle of Rami's unrestrained laughter, completely unfazed> I don't feel like it's high enough.
- Afterwards, STAR_ turns screenshake up to 800%.
- Later, Rami starts sending STAR_ special builds of the game and asks him to play them live.
- The first thing that comes to attention is the change from 30 FPS to 60 FPS, which results in everything playing at double speed.
STAR_: Okay, let's not dive into this, let's take this real slow, nice and easy... I see none of the characters... agree with me on this, but, I'm- I'm going slowly.
- Then he discovers the rest of the... changes Rami made to the game.
STAR_: Why... why do I have... why do I have 1 health?
- In short: every character starts with 1/1 HP, you can choose 9 mutations at level 1 before the first level starts, and the default weapon is a cursed nuke launcher that fires 3 nukes PER SHOT.
STAR_: <after killing himself> BUHLB- melting...! Veins doesn't work!
- Just when STAR_ figures out how to play without killing himself, Rami declares that he's building a new version.
Rami: Dude, I did something, and if this works, it's gonna be, by far... the dumbest thing that ever happened to a video game.
STAR_: I have the lowest expectations.
- And thus began the reason why Nuclear Throne's setting is a wasteland.
Rami: Every missile you shoot turns into three... missiles... every second. And those new missiles will turn into three missiles every second.
STAR_: Oh, no, nononononononononoNONO, NO NO NO NO NO NO NO...! Everything blow up, please, PLEASE! ...I was so close to ending th-the... game, and just closing it there.
Rami: Oh my god, people watching now, that get introduced to this game, are SO confused.
- After completely destroying all of the previous levels, STAR_ unexpectedly runs into a surprise in the caves.
STAR_: HOLY SHIT IT'S HORROR!! <breaks down into laughter> HOW DID- of all the NUKES I fired, how have I NOT destroyed radiation canisters?! That's all I've done!
- The next build Rami sends to STAR_ manages to surpass the last one in terms of sheer ridiculousness.
Rami: So, I gave the nukes a bit of a... oomph.
- What did Rami do? Well, in STAR_'s own words...
STAR_: <while trying to hold back laughter> You... fucking kidding me? It's a DISCO SHOW! I'm in a fricking RAVE right now! Why did you think that THIS was the okay thing to do?
Rami: Isn't it beautiful?
STAR_: It actually really is! You wanna talk about art...?
Rami: This is how- this is- this is, like... if anybody ever asks me why I sh- why you should become a game developer, THIS is my answer. Like, I will just link them to this video.
- Rami proposes a scientific study: "If you just fire towards the Throne, will that kill it?"
STAR_: It's dead.
- The next iteration:
Rami: Every second, it will split into two extra nukes. Now, the nukes, instead of firing lasers, will fire... uh, super flak cannons. Now the super flak cannons, will burst into flak cannons, when they hit the wall. Right, the- the flak cannon bullets will fire lasers in random directions... in disco colors.
STAR_: See, now you're describing to me the circle of life right now. Is that a food chain which you've just—
Rami: I'm actually not sure, but what I DO know, is that this looks like a rave party.
STAR_: It's ju- lightning, as well? I don't think you've mentioned lightning.
Rami: Yeah. Yep, it's lightning as well.
<STAR_ fires the new weapon in the middle of a large room; the resulting bloom of effects causes him to crack up>
STAR_: It's like I'm in a spider web! ...I'm in a disco spider web!
Rami: Yes! ...Did it crash?
STAR_: No, not yet! I'm- It's one frame every fourth second at this point, but I'm- I'm still kicking.
- To cap the whole insanity off, STAR_ decides to try and crash the game by firing THE WEAPON a few times in an open space.
STAR_: I-I could only get two shots off before everything is locked up right now, so we'll see how this ends.
Rami: Just... keep clicking, why not?
STAR_: <furiously mashes the mouse button> It's just- it's just a white screen! You've INVENTED... the color white! Congratulations, would you like your nomination for... color... man.
, wherein STAR_ invites the viewer to be flabbergasted alongside him at an Idiot Plot in The 100.- Repeated throwbacks to Finn's justification for his massacre of eighteen innocent, unarmed villagers:
Clarke: "You just kept shooting..."
Finn: "We did what we had to do." (Flashing caption "ACCIDENT")
- A small rant that could well be a page quote somewhere in here:
Star_: "Our story, of course, begins with young Finn falling in love with the main character, something I would never recommend that you do. It pretty much means that you're devoting your whole life to creating dramatic situations for another person, and the most dramatic thing you can do is die."
- The sudden MLG montage when Finn starts shooting.
- "He did it for me!" *cue flashback to the shooting, with "<3 for you <3" written on the screen*
. After beating the old PS1 game Jackie Chan: Stuntmaster Star decides he doesn't need his old console anymore, and places it in the toilet. Followed by another PS1. And another. And two more. Then when they don't flush he pokes at them with a toilet plunger.Marc Brown: (in the comments) "Why do you have five PlayStations?"
STAR_: "To be one generation ahead of you plebs"
, in which Ster teams up with Jerma and decides to let him know when to use the Kritzkrieg... by screaming at the top of his lungs. - The first time Star screams, Jerma is so caught off guard that he snorts while laughing, then clarifies that he doesn't usually do that. Star proceeds to repeat the phrase for hilarity.
- Jerma comparing Star's screaming to the Judge from Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Complete with edited in shot from said film.
- Immediately after that, Star says he heard one of his neighbors come out of their apartment because they heard him scream.
- Eventually, Jerma is reduced to BEGGING Star to ask for kritz normally.
Jerma: Please, just-just say, 'Jerma, I would like for you to give me the kritzkrieg now, please.'
Star: Okay. *At the top of his lungs* JERMA THE CRITS! JERMA!
Where Did Jerma Say I Soiled My Baby Diaper
Source: https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Funny/STAR
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